My fave five

Last week, in a desperate attempt to create a believable premise for this column, I decided to keep a log to document just how much time I spend wrapped up in my only little digital world.

(You might be thinking, “Jonesy, you have no life and will do anything to get yet another column done.” Well, you are right – and I hate you for knowing me so well.)

So I put sticky notes on my laptop and my now beloved iPad and made a little hash mark on them for every hour I sat in front of the magic glowing screen.

(I found out later there are a number of free computer programs to track the time you spend on your computer. Ironically stupid, eh?)

Anyway, I did the math over the weekend and discovered I averaged nine hours a day in front of a magic glowing screen. Nine frickin’ hours a day, kids! More than half of my waking life, I am doing what I’m doing now: tapping away furiously at a keyboard, toggling between e-mail, Word, Excel, PowerPoint, several customized programs and, lest we forget, visiting the wondrous land of the Internet.

(Let me pause to pay tribute to the late Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska, the man who brought you the “Bridge to Nowhere,” who once said:  “The Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It’s not a big truck. It’s a series of tubes. And if you don’t understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it’s going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material.” He went on to suggest Al Gore be impeached for inventing those damned tubes. But I digress…)

Anyway, in my continuing examination of my own computer usage habits, I also gulped hard and counted the number of Internet bookmarks I maintain. The total was 122.

(And no, none of them are porn links, at least as far as my IT manager knows. I just hope he never opens the folder named “Serious Important Business Stuff and Not Hot MILF Sites or Anything Inappropriate Like That.”)

While I was looking at my list of totally porn-free bookmarks, I started to consider which websites I liked and visited the most and decided to share them with you:

• Facebook: The American public is divided about whether Facebook is an utter waste of time, a playground that encourages people to post stupid things that bore or amuse others or the greatest source of personal connectivity every created. The American public is right on all three counts. Facebook is redefining how a chunk of the world relates to the rest of the world. It sounds crazy, but it’s a serious social revolution too often hidden behind “Mafia Wars,” “Farmville” and videos of cute kittens stuck in tissue boxes.
• Wikipedia: Go to Wikipedia and do a search for the Colbert-ism “truthiness” and you will know everything you need to know about Wikipedia. If you’re looking for quick, sort-of-right answers, this is the place for you.
• iGoogle: All your crap in one place. Just go to the plain old Google homepage, click on iGoogle and start building your own little information universe. If you want to know more, the doorway to the great and powerful Oz of search engines is right there on the same page. Magnificent efficiency that proves why the guys who built it are gozillionaires.
• Progressbook: If you have kids, you probably have this online service or something like it. It’s a password-protected site that lets you keep nearly real-time tabs on your children’s grades, attendance and behavior. Absolutely wonderful tool for dad and mom. Sucks hard for kids.
• Epicurious: My second-favorite iPad app (besides GCI’s). It’s a wonderful searchable database of unbelievable recipes rated by quality, ease of preparation and popularity. It’s an endless source of entertainment and food orgasms.

Those are my five. Love to hear yours. But, before you shoot off your e-mail with your list, wait a few weeks and check out GCI’s newly redesigned, revamped and redunkulously cool  new site. Same URL, same great original content but way more slick stuff designed to keep you glued to your computer for nine frickin’ hours a day. Enjoy! GCI